LGBTQ+ Parents of Hospitalized Children: Three Tips for an Inclusive Experience
Providing Affirming Care to LGBTQ+ Families in Healthcare
Dr. Shannon Whittington (she/her), DNP, MSN, CCM
The world is becoming more diverse, and so are family structures. As pediatric healthcare providers, we encounter family dynamics beyond the traditional Mom-Dad unit. This can be challenging for those new to this dynamic. However, as humans, we have evolved to better understand diverse family structures by challenging our old belief systems. Nations, cultures, and races continue to intertwine, giving birth to brilliant new ideas and beautiful people.
Despite this evolution, the LGBTQ+ community still faces healthcare discrimination daily. It is our duty as healthcare providers to deliver culturally sensitive care to all individuals and families, regardless of their identity.
While we strive to provide the best possible experience for everyone, we may lack the necessary skills. Here are three ways to provide affirming care to LGBTQ+ parents of hospitalized children:
1. Refrain from Assumptions
As a member of the LGBTQ+ community and a certified LGBTQ+ clinical nurse educator, I advise practicing new questioning instead of old assumptions. When meeting families, we may encounter diverse family structures. Instead of assuming, ask, “What is your relationship to child x?” You may hear responses like:
“I’m/we’re the mom(s)/dad(s),”
“I’m the birth mom,”
“I’m the surrogate mom,”
“I’m the donor dad,”
“We are the chosen dad or parent,” etc.
Be open to all types of answers, knowing that family structures are ever-changing. What matters most is that the child has loving parent(s), and it is our duty to provide excellent care to each of them.
2. Remain Non-judgmental
Everyone deserves dignity and respect, regardless of sexual orientation, gender identity, or family structure. LGBTQ+ individuals and families often face discrimination in healthcare settings, leading to negative health outcomes (Darwin and Greenfield, 2023). As healthcare providers, it is essential to remain non-judgmental and open-minded.
Avoid negative comments or actions that may make parents or children feel uncomfortable or discriminated against. Approach them with empathy, understanding, and a willingness to learn about their needs and concerns. By doing so, you create a safe and welcoming environment that promotes inclusiveness and belonging.
3. Follow the Parents' Lead
Every family is unique, and respecting the parents' lead when working with LGBTQ+ families is crucial. Research shows that following the lead of LGBTQ+ parents increases trust, reduces stress and anxiety, and improves health outcomes for both parents and children (Kerppola et al., 2019).
Allow parents to guide the conversation and share information about their family structure and the child's needs comfortably. If they prefer to be addressed as "Mom" and "Dad," honor their wishes and avoid using terms that may be insensitive or confusing.
Listen to their concerns and respond supportively and non-judgmentally. By following the parents' lead, you build trust and establish a strong working relationship, enhancing the child's healthcare experience.
Finally, educate yourself on issues affecting the LGBTQ+ community. Reading and sharing articles like this one is a good start. If you encounter something contrary to what you've learned, speak up. Approach the situation lovingly and don't let it slide. Embracing change and educating ourselves in all areas of practice allows us to be better clinicians and provide better care. As my Mom says, once you know better, you do better.
References:
Darwin, Z., & Greenfield, M. (2023). Diversity of Family Formation: LGBTQ+ Parents. In Perspectives on Midwifery and Parenthood. Cham: Springer International Publishing.
Kerppola, J., Halme, N., Perälä, M. L., & Maija‐Pietilä, A. (2019). Parental empowerment—Lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans or queer parents' perceptions of maternity and child healthcare. International Journal of Nursing Practice, 25(5), e12755.
About the Author
Dr. Shannon Whittington (she/her), DNP, MSN, CCM, is the author of the bestselling book: LGBTQ+: ABCs For Grownups, and Kindergarten For Leaders: 9 Essential Tips For Grownup Success. She is a certified speaker advocating for LGBTQ+ Patient-Centered Care and Workplace Inclusion. Her mission is to transform healthcare delivery for the rainbow community. For bookings, contact Dr. Whittington at hello@WhittingtonConsulting.com.